Day in the Life

An open letter to engaged women.

Hey you with that engagement ring. Yeah, you. I was you just a few months ago. Your wedding might be days, weeks, months, or even years away. I know. The wait is terrible. You just want to spend the rest of your life with your husband happily ever after. Believe me, it sucks.

You might be nervous about your wedding. Will all the vendors get there on time? Will people show up? Will the music be played corectly? Will I fall down the aisle (one of my favorite worries)? Perhaps you’ve had some bad dreams leading up to your big day. Maybe you’re still having them. I did too, it’s okay.

The truth is, nothing about your wedding day matters. It really doesn’t. Something will go wrong (I’m sure a lot of people tell you this, but I assure you, it will). And you know what? It really doesn’t matter. If I would’ve fallen down the aisle, I would’ve laughed. My vows were messed up, I laughed through them. Our pastor forgot to read the Gospel (until I reminded him). I forgot my garter and Jim forgot his letter he wrote to me. And none of that mattered at all.

You know why? Because it’s the marriage that matters, not the wedding. All of your friends and family love you for YOU and are happy for YOUR marriage! They don’t care what your centerpieces are (seriously, they don’t. Can you remember any centerpieces from weddings you’ve gone to? Me either). They are there to celebrate YOUR love and YOUR marriage.

You’ve probably heard that annoying saying that your wedding is one day and your marriage is for life. Well it’s true.
Maybe I’m weird but I didn’t put as much emphasis on the wedding day. I didn’t stress about it (until the day of!) and tried not to worry about the little details. They might make your wedding stand out but would you rather have your wedding stand out or your marriage? Do you want to be an example for other couples through how you live your lives as a married couple, or do you care more about having the best wedding?

To be honest, I wanted my wedding to be perfect (who doesn’t?) but those mistakes and funny things that happened are the things that I am going to remember. And I spent the day laughing and enjoying the fact that I was now married to my husband. I would rather be the model of a healthy marriage than the model of the best wedding. How about you?

Oh, and have fun and don’t stress on your wedding day. It really is the best day ever! 

ceremony5

Post 2 of my 7 days

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3 Comments

  1. one of us WILL trip at some point. I’m planning on it. :)

  2. Carol

    Your wedding was beautiful and so fun even with the tiny slip ups! (Like your isle bows trying to eat my beautiful lace dress.)

  3. I think the message newlywed women send out these days is a mixed one. They tell their friends that the important part is the marriage yet their blog photos and posts are full of reminiscing about the wedding for months and months and months and months. Blogs didn’t exist when I got married, so I cant tell you for sure what I would have done if I had a blog in 1986 (if memory serves, I am pretty sure that I was a silly self absorbed girl, so it might not have been optimal). Us Catholic women are deeper than talking about what cake we picked for our wedding for the 5 years subsequent to that day.

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